Feeling Less

Feeling Less vs Feeling better

Listen up EMS….your goal should not be to feel less stress.⁠

You are going to feel that way because of the jobs we do. ⁠

The goal is to learn how to process your stress in a way that does not create MORE stress.⁠

We try to feel less stress by distracting ourselves from it. Eating, drinking, shopping, TV watching, gambling, porn…this does not make you feel less stress. ⁠

The problem is that in the moments we are distracting ourselves from the stress, we feel good thanks to thinking about the food/ETOH, etc and the dopamine hit we get from doing those things. ⁠

Your feeling of stress will wait for you. It always does. Now, you’ve just compounded your stress. And, you feel worse. ⁠

Look, I’ve been there, hell, I still go there. I get it. It still is not the solution to the stress.⁠

Just being aware that this is going on is super helpful. Pay attention.⁠

xo. Valerie⁠

Come join my communities!  

If you are a WOMEN in EMS, click HERE to join the ALL EMS WOMEN private FB Page!

Open to both Women and Men in EMS is my EMS Weight Loss & Well Being private FB Page.  To join, click HERE.

PS. Watch the FREE video training I made on the ABC’s of Weight Loss for EMS.   Just click the blue button below to watch the video.

Cinco de Mayo

Margarita
Cinco de Mayo
 
I have spent many years using this day as an EXCUSE to OVERinduldge.
 
Now, since paving my path to permanent weight loss I approach this day as an EXCEPTION in my eating protocol which has been well planned out ahead of time.
 
As a weight loss coach, one of the fundamentals I teach is something called Pre-Frontal Planning.
 
This means we use our Pre-Frontal Cortex to plan what we will eat and drink ahead of time. NOT in the moment with our Primitive Brain.
 
Why does this matter?
 
Most of us live our life by making decisions from our Primitive Brain: I want it NOW. Instant satisfaction. MORE, MORE, MORE. It’s like the devil on your shoulder whispering in your ear…”you totally deserve that drink today. You worked hard. Go ahead, have it.” Living from and making decisions from the Primitive Brain feels good in the moment. Unfortunately, it can’t predict how you will feel LATER.
 
It can’t foresee that pleasure from OVEReating now will result in weight gain LATER.
 
Pre-Frontal Planning is using the part of our brain that can predict the future consequences of decisions. If…then… If I drink now, then I will feel terrible later.
 
If I OVEReat I will see an increase on the scale.
 
When we plan our food and drink ahead of time, we do so with our future in mind.
 
We can make decisions based on our LONG term goals, which will feel amazing.

 

  • I have decided that I will have two Margaritas today.
  • I have decided that I will have homemade chips, salsa and guacamole today.
  • I have decided that I will eat baked Mexican chicken casserole today.
  • I will stop eating when I feel just satisfied. Not full.
  • I will not overeat.
 
I also make this exception knowing that I might now see the scale go down this week.
 
I’m ok with that. This is the EXCEPTION not my daily RULE.
One last thing….don’t think for a SECOND that this is EASY.
 
Our Primitive Brains are what evolved the humans.
 
It will not sit quietly while I eat chips and salsa and wash it down with a drink.
 
I’m ok now sitting with that feeling of wanting more and not having it.
 
This takes a ton of practice and failure.
 
Happy Cinco de Mayo!
 
xo. Val

PS. Watch the FREE video training I made on the ABC’s of Weight Loss for EMS.   Just click the blue button below to watch the video.

Come join my communities!  

If you are a WOMEN in EMS, click HERE to join the ALL EMS WOMEN private FB Page!

Open to both Women and Men in EMS is my EMS Weight Loss & Well Being private FB Page.  To join, click HERE.

Transition Times & Weight Gain

Most people think they gain weight because they are eating too much food and not working out enough.

This is only PART of the problem.

When I discovered that I really struggle with Transition Times, it opened up my eyes to an area that was causing weight gain.]

In this video I will teach you where to be on the look out for transitions and some solutions!

Want to hear more from me?

Join my private FB Group. Click the link and answer the questions and with in a few min…you are IN! https://www.facebook.com/groups/HEMScoachGroup/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HEMScoach/

FREE Resources

1. Grab a copy of my FREE GUIDE, where I will teach you the ONE thing you need to know to Lose Weight…On Duty or Off!

https://www.hemscoach.com/free-guide/

2. Food Resource Worksheets. 

https://www.hemscoach.com/food/

3. Weekly Time Planning Worksheet

https://www.hemscoach.com/weeklyplanner/

4.  Join my email list.  I send out about two emails per week.  I try to keep them short and to  the point.

https://mailchi.mp/8a74cac380de/weightandbalance

Products I love and use*.

Check out my Kit Store…https://kit.co/VBestland

*These are NOT affiliate links.

Be Well and Be Safe up there!

xo.  Valerie Bestland

Negativity

Happy

If you are feeling like the world is so negative right now listen up.⁠

Why are you focusing on the negativity?⁠

Our brain is built with negativity bias. It is constantly looking for negativity as a way to keep us safe. ⁠

Good to know, and thank you brain for trying to keep me safe.⁠

Did you know that you can choose to focus on the positive? Yep, even during a pandemic.⁠

My husband is the best at this. But, he works at it. ⁠

This is really hard for me. I like focus on the negative. I think it feels protective in a way. ⁠

What sucks, is that when I focus on the negative things I feel shitty. ⁠

Then my brain offers up ways to feel better…and the quickest way to do that is with food. Especially sweets. I eat them, then guess what??? I feel shitty again.⁠

This turns into a negative feedback loop.⁠

I can see now when this is starting for me and I have to force myself out of the negative feedback loop.⁠

Here’s how I change my perspective….I start thinking about everything I am grateful for. Start with your body, get specific…I am grateful for my brain, my vision, the sense of smell, the taste of my favorite food, my ears to hear the sounds of my kids laughing….you get the idea. ⁠

If you are feeling really negative at work, see if you can find 25 things to be grateful for…I’m grateful for the helicopter, our mechanics that keep them working and safe, the pilots for having the skills and knowledge to fly, Zoll monitor to monitor patients, and so on.⁠

This takes practice and patience.⁠

Give it a try and see how you feel. ⁠

I am so grateful for you.⁠

You can do this. WE can do this!!⁠

xoxo. Valerie⁠

PS. Watch the FREE video training I made on the ABC’s of Weight Loss for EMS.   Just click the blue button below to watch the video.

Come join my communities!  

If you are a WOMEN in EMS, click HERE to join the ALL EMS WOMEN private FB Page!

Open to both Women and Men in EMS is my EMS Weight Loss & Well Being private FB Page.  To join, click HERE.

Decisions

Weight Loss comes from the decisions you make.⁠

What you DECIDE to put in your mouth.⁠

Right before you decide to eat or drink something ask yourself this….⁠

If I say YES to this, what am I saying NO to at the same time?⁠

If I say YES to a cookie, I’m also say NO to my goal.⁠

If I say NO to a cookies, I’m saying YES to my goal.⁠

Your decisions matter.⁠

Every bite of food matters.⁠

What is the next best decision you can make?⁠

xo. ⁠ Valerie

PS. Watch the FREE video training I made on the ABC’s of Weight Loss for EMS.   Just click the blue button below to watch the video.

Come join my communities!  

If you are a WOMEN in EMS, click HERE to join the ALL EMS WOMEN private FB Page!

Open to both Women and Men in EMS is my EMS Weight Loss & Well Being private FB Page.  To join, click HERE.

Stay Well EMS

Stay Well EMS

Good morning!⁠

As many of us head in to work this morning I want you to think about how you can stay well while on Duty.⁠

What would that look like for you?⁠

Are you willing to put your brain to work and figure out how to drink a few extra bottles of water today?⁠

What about deciding to only eat when you are hungry and stop when you feel satisfied…not full?⁠

How can you move you move your body while not on a call?⁠

What about when you feel the stress building up while en route to a trauma? Can you take 4 slow very deep breaths? ⁠

If you do have a bad trauma and you are feeling especially stressed when you clear the hospital (and your not driving!) pull out your phone and play a game on your phone for a few min.⁠

I know these things seem small and don’t seem like they matter, but my friends, they do. ⁠

Taking care of ourselves during this pandemic is critical.⁠

Have a safe day.⁠

xo. Val⁠

PS. Watch the FREE video training I made on the ABC’s of Weight Loss for EMS.   Just click the blue button below to watch the video.


Come join my communities!  

If you are a WOMEN in EMS, click HERE to join the ALL EMS WOMEN private FB Page!

Open to both Women and Men  in EMS is my EMS Weight Loss & Well Being private FB Page.  To join, click HERE.

Boredom

Boredom

This topic has been popping up all week.

The weather has not been great for flying.  

Our industry has downtime.  Sometimes due to poor weather, or just the nature of the job.

It seems like we have two modes: Busy. Not Busy.

Once all of the daily duties are done and we are caught up with education and all those emails, we have downtime.

What are you doing with your downtime…..

Do you spend that time on your phone trolling social media?

Play games on the computer or your phone?

Sit in the recliner watching the NCIS marathon on TV?

Read a book, magazine, paper (do people still get those?)?

Or do you eat?  Grab just a little snack? 

Why don’t you just sit there and be bored?

We live in a culture that thrives on instant gratification.

We can pick up our phone and instantly be entertained.

We think that being bored means that we are boring.

We find the feeling of boredom so intolerable, we will do anything to avoid it.

The biggest reason we want to avoid boredom is because we have to sit with our own thoughts.

Many of those thoughts make us feel terrible.  We ruminate or thought loop on a few thoughts all the time.

“Why can’t I lose weight. I can’t control my eating. How did I get like this. Why is it so hard to lose weight.  I shouldn’t have ate that. I’m stuck.”

What do we do when we feel bored?  We buffer.

Buffering is when we want dull an emotion we are feeling.  

We most often buffer with False Pleasures.  

False Pleasure are concentrated forms of natural pleasure.  Just like sugar and flour are concentrated versions of the sugar beet (or cane) and wheat berry.

Our brains are flooded with the neurotransmitter Dopamine from False Pleasures.  

Natural pleasures give us a small “hit” of Dopamine that pales in comparison to the False kind.

Can you see how you have been buffering from boredom?

One of the common causes of weight gain in EMS is due to boredom.

We eat when we are bored.  We use food as a distraction from our negative emotions.

We try to use food to make us feel better.  

We will give ourselves that huge hit of dopamine with a cookies, chips, ice cream, or some other snack and that feels really good in the moment.

What is the result we get?  Net negative consequences like weight gain.

If you are wanting to lose weight, I recommend to everyone that they stop snacking.

I never used to consider myself and emotional eater or a snacker.  Turns out, I was. 

When I started my weight loss journey, it become very clear that I would do whatever it took to avoid boredom.

Sitting with my own thoughts was so painful, I would do things that had negative consequences.  Like snacking at work, which would cause weight gain. Having a few beers at  home after the kids went to bed, this one really disrupted my hormones and caused weight gain.

Now, I love being bored.  I intentionally set time to be bored.  I use this time to look at my thoughts.  To question them and decide if I want to continue to think them.

When we allow boredom, we can enter a sate neuroscientist call Autobiographical Planning.

This is where we can look at our life in the big picture sense and decide how we want to live our future.  We can see and figure out our big goals and consider how to get there.

If you are always buffering from boredom, you won’t be able to access this part of your brain.  You will just stay right where you are at.

The next time you find yourself bored at work, see if you can just sit with it for 5-10 min.

See what thoughts are coming up for you.  How are you feeling?

If you want to be an over achiever (and I’m pretty sure you do) grab a notepad and write these thoughts down.  See if you can name the feelings you are having.  Can you feel the urge to go buffer?  What do you want to do to make these feelings go away…check your phone, look at Facebook, check your email, turn on the TV?  What are the net negative consequence you have gotten in the past from buffering?

If you want to take this information to the next level, let me help you.

We can get on the phone and I can show you how working with me can change your life.  It’s free and super easy to do. 

xo.

Valerie

Diet Mentality

Diet Mentality 

Diet mentality thinking…

How many calories should I be eating?

What about the Macros?

I’m not able to lose weight because I can’t fit working out in my busy day.

That food is bad.

Calories in. Calories out.

Everything is fine in moderation.

I just want to eat like a normal person.

If I can’t do it perfect, I don’t want to do it.

I just have to be good long enough to get to size ___.

I need to get this weight off by summer.

Throwing away all the “junk” food in the house will make it easier to not want it.

Have you ever thought any of those above thoughts? Is that how you are currently thinking about dieting?

I would argue that thinking any of the above thoughts will not get you permeant weight loss.

The result of weight loss comes directly from our thinking. 

Most people think weight loss comes from the gym and the kitchen.

Ok, a little might come from the gym. A lot comes from the kitchen, but the majority comes from our thinking.

I work with my clients to drop the diet mentality thinking.

I show them how their thoughts end up in their results.

Here are some examples of thoughts that will result in weight loss.

I’m choosing not to have that today.
I didn’t plan for that today.
I can have it tomorrow.
It is ok to feel hungry.
Every bite does matter.
If I say yes to that free cookie, I am saying no to my goal weight.

I also encourage my clients to ask themselves a lot of questions…and answer them!

How can I lose weight today?
How does that feel in my body?
Does that food serve me?
What emotion am I trying to avoid by having this snack?
Am I really hungry?
Why?

If you are looking to drop some weight and drop your diet mentality, I would love to talk to you! 

Click the blue Book Now button below to set up a Free 30 min Consult Call with me. I will take you through your Before and After, it can be life changing.

Talk soon.

xo. Valerie

The Past

The Past

My clients want to go to the past.

“When I was thin….when I could do….When I could eat whatever I wanted…”

They romanticize the past and think that everything was so much better “back then”.

What I show them is that their past is what GOT them to where they are NOW…in an overweight body.

Do you really want to go back there? Do you really want to live how you did then now?

Because you will get the same result. Each and every time.

The past is where we learn lessons. 

We use the lessons of the past to make our future better.

What purpose does it serve to keep looking to the past? It just keeps where you are.

This is your primitive brain BTW. It wants you to stay the same. It’s easier that way.

Sure, at times you feel bad about your weight, but it just feels so much better to do what is familiar (aka habits)…like coming home from work and opening a bottle of wine while you cook dinner, or having cheese and crackers after the kids go to bed while you “relax” and watch TV.

Weight loss is hard for many reasons. You are trying to change your habits which is very uncomfortable for your brain. It doesn’t know what you are seeking is long term satisfaction of being at your goal weight. It just wants to feel good in the moment.

These are competing desires. 

On the one hand we have the desire to feel good, avoid pain/suffering, to do what is familiar.

On the other hand we have the desire to lose weight, feel comfortable in our body, sleep better, have less aches and pains, and improve our health.

These are the competing forces of your primitive brain vs your pre-frontal cortex.

If you want permeant weight loss, you are going to have to overcome your primitive desires.

This is not easy. 

You are deciding to feel discomfort on purpose.

This is how we get to the next version of who we are.

You can totally do hard things….I know this because you are in HEMS.

We do hard shit all the time.

We have to make our patients feel discomfort for their own good…think about starting an IV…yes, it is uncomfortable, but we need it to give them medicine that will help you.
If you are up for this weight loss journey, and I really hope you are, you are going to have to commit to feeling discomfort. 

You need to go through the discomfort to get the result you want. 

It’s part of the deal.

But, the good news is I am here to help you. Let me help you lose the extra weight for good.

Click the blue Book Now button below to book a Free 30 min Consult Call with me on a day and time that works best for you. On this call, I will show you how you got where you are and who your future self could be.

Xo. Valerie

PS. I fly full time, so my availability is limited. The sooner you sign up, the better!

Normal


I just want to eat like a “Normal” person.

If you are anything like me, you have said that many times in the face of weight loss.

Let’s stop and think about this.

What is normal?

Why do we just want to be normal?

Can’t we do better than “normal”?

Here is the truth about normal……

Normal in our country is obesity.

It is normal to overeat.

It is normal to drink alcohol all the time.

Its is normal to use food & booze as our only source of entertainment.

The reason we feel such pressure to “be normal” is because of our Primitive Brain.

Our primitive brain thinks it is dangerous to not fit in with the herd. 

What our brain does not know is that it is the year 2019 and nothing bad will happen if we don’t have beer at Happy Hour, or a cupcake at the Birthday Party.

Your brain will go to work with thoughts that will lead you to “be normal” and drink at Happy Hour or eat the Birthday cupcake.

Eating “normal” got you to where you are now…..overweight.

Maybe you want to re-read that last part.

Now ask yourself “do I really want to eat normal?” 

If you do, you WILL GET THE SAME RESULT.

Simple math formula for you…

Eating normal = being overweight.

I do NOT want to be normal.

I do NOT want eat like a normal person. 

If you want to stop eating like a normal person, you are going to have to think and feel things you are not very good at, and that will be uncomfortable.

Being overweight is uncomfortable. 

Which do you choose?

If you want me to help you learn to eat in a way that is NOT NORMAL & does not result in an overweight body, click the blue button below.  This will take you to my schedule where you can book a Free 30 min consult call at a day and time that works best for you.  I will show you how different your life can be!

Xo. Valerie

Busy

Busy.

I am so busy.

Why do we glorify “Busy”?

We wear our busyness as a badge of honor.

But are you reeaalllyyy busy? C’mon…..tell the truth.

Being on you phone, trolling social, watching TV, listening to a podcast is not busy.

Those are distractions. 

Why do you want to be busy?

Is it possible you are just being busy to distract yourself?

Distracting yourself from your own negative self talk.

Many of us stay busy because we don’t like the idea of being alone with ourselves, with our own (painful) thoughts.

The truth about busyness is that it does not drive any action.

Yeah, you might get a few things off your to-do list, but you likely aren’t doing that ONE things you know you need to do.

If you really think you are a special snowflake and are over scheduled, I challenge you to do a time journal for three days. This is where you write down what you are doing every 30min from the time you get up until the time you go to bed.

I call this a reality check. I did this. Turns out, I was super busy…doing stupid shit all day. 

I made some radical changes. 

Goodbye NCIS, Foodnetwork, Bravo, HGTV. I will miss our time together, but I need to GSD.

I started saying no to everyone and everything that did not align with my goals. 

“I’d love to volunteer, but I can’t, I’m sorry”.

Another thing I changed was dropping the word “Busy” from my vocab. 

I’ll catch myself every now and again, and I notice how terrible it feels when I say it.

Then you’ll notice how everyone around you says how busy they are.

I challenge you to tell yourself the truth about what you are really “busy” doing…then drop the word busy all together.

Want help from me to free you from the busy mindset and get you taking real action on your goals? Whether you want to lose weight or feel better, I can help.

Click the the blue Book Now button below.  This will take you to my Free 30 min Consult Call schedule.  Pick a date and time that works best for you and we will get on the phone and I’ll show you how different your life can be!

I look forward to hearing from you!!

Xo. Valerie