The other “F” word.
It is a verb. An action.
The definition is simple; to stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone.
Someday I will write about forgiving other people.
Today, I want to you to think about forgiving yourself.
Think about how different your life could be, how different you would show up for yourself and others if you forgave yourself.
Forgive all the wrongs you have done, let go of the guilt, drop the shame, stop the self-loathing and judgement.
When you stop feeling anger and resentment toward yourself, you will feel so much better.
Here is how I like to forgive myself.
Grab a piece of paper and pen.
Write down all the wrongs you have done, all the things you feel guilty about, all the reasons why you feel ashamed of yourself, all of self-loathing thoughts and the judgements of yourself.
Ask yourself if continuing to think and feel this way is serving you. Usually the answer is no.
I like to think about what I would say to my best friend if she came to me with that list of thoughts and feelings.
Would I tell her “yep, looks like you are a super bad person. You should for sure keep feeling anger and resentment. You deserve it. You need to suffer for the rest of your life, if you don’t you are condoning your actions”.
There is no way most of us would say that. So why do you say it to yourself?
I would say, “listen, you were doing the best you could. You are a human. Humans make mistakes. Sometimes our best is not good. That is the way it was supposed to happen. Nothing has gone wrong. You are 100% worthy because you are here. It is time to let go of the anger and resentment, it does not serve you today and in this moment. I love you no matter what.”
Take that piece of paper and rip in to tiny pieces, put it in a fire proof bowl and lite it on fire.
Spread those ashes on the Earth and say “I forgive myself and set myself free”.
Let that shit go.
Start living from your future, not your past. It is time to more forward.