Questions

High Quality vs Low Quality Q’s.

We know providers who are really dialed in on
their assessment skills.👩‍⚕️

They ask great high quality questions.👏

They get very focused answers.🔍

We know other providers who ask low quality questions, and no surprise, they get vague answers. 👎

Now, think about the questions you ask yourself daily.

“Why am I so fat?”
“How did I get here?”
“Why is it so hard?”
“What is wrong with me?”
“Why is it taking so long?”
“Why do I keep doing this to myself?”
“Why can’t I get it together?”

I’m sure some of these sound familiar if you have ever tried to lose weight.

These are low quality questions that might 
make you feel disempowered.😕

When you feel disempowered, it’s likely you won’t take any actions that will lead to weight loss.😤

Asking yourself high quality, empowering questions will put your super computer brain to work.🧠🖥

You need to access your own wisdom and your brain will come up with an inspiring answer!💡💬

“How can I lose weight today?”
“How can I lose weight permanently with out feeling deprivation?”
“How can I honor my body today?”

Can you feel the difference in these questions?

Don’t allow your brain say “I don’t know”.  🙅‍♀️

This will block all your wisdom.  🚫

Follow that up immediately with “But if I did know….what would the answer be?”

Now, ask yourself a high quality question every day.❓

Write that question down on several post-its and put all over your house.🖊

Let your brain get to work on the answer.

If you want someone to ask you a lot of high quality questions and come up with the solution of permanent weight loss, you should hire {me!} as your coach.

I work with clients 1:1 over the phone for 6 or 12 weeks.

I have put together a program that is really focused on how we in HEMS can lose weight.⚖️

Using these tools I lost over 50#’s.

Click the blue “Book Now” button and set up a free consultation call with me.✔️📞

PS. I can only work with so many people per week due to my full time work schedule! 📆🚁

Message me with Q’s!

xo. Valerie

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Failure

Failure

Failure is defined as “lack of success”.

That is a pretty harmless definition, yet we make “Failure” mean far worse.

So many of us hold ourselves back from things because we are terrified of failure.

What do you make failure mean?

What would you do if you were guaranteed not to fail?

I have had a complete shift in how I think of failure.

I don’t make it mean anything about me. 

Failure only means “lack of success”…Not, “you suck because you ________.”

If we fail at something, it means we still have learning to do.

We need failure so we can have success.

Failures are the building blocks to our goal.

Have you tried many diets only to fail at them and gain the weight back?

This is great news because you learned from those past diets…of what does not work for you.

You didn’t learn the skills necessary to maintain your weight loss.

Don’t make it mean that you are never going to lose weight. That you are a failure.

If you want different results, you are going to have to try something you haven’t tried before.

This is where I can really help you.

I have been where you are.

I have learned many things, and I keep failing and learning. Still. Even after losing over 50#.

If you are ready to lose weight in a new way permanently, let’s get on a consult call.

It’s free, over the phone, no pressure. We talk, I tell you what I have to offer in my weight loss program designed for us in HEMS. I truly want to help you lose weight for the last time.📞

Click the blue “Book Now” button  below to go to my schedule.

Talk soon.

xxoo. Valerie

PS. I can only work with so many people per week due to my full time work schedule, so get on now before the weight list. (did you see what I did there? LOL)😂

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Quitting vs quitting


Quitting

Are you a Quitter?

Have you tried multiple diets? 

Have you tried to change a bad habit and found yourself quitting because it was too hard?

We are really good at justifying our quits…

“This is really hard” “I’m just too busy right now” “Now is not a good time” “My work schedule is just too complicated” “I’m too tired”

In the moment you decide to quit something, you feel relief.

After you quit something you likely have a lot of negative self talk, feel guilt and shame.

“Why? Why do I keep doing this to myself?”

Quitting is a habit.

Our brain is used to use quitting. 

Think about the majority of your days. 

If you are anything like me, you will have day after day filled with microquits.

What’s a microquit? It is all of those little quits you do.

I planned to go workout out, but cancelled at the last min. I want to go for a walk but it is snowing out.
I planned dinner, but didn’t feel like eating that so we went out for dinner instead. I planned to not drink tonight, but did anyways.

Any of this sound familiar?

These microquits eventually lead to the Big Quit.

You Quit the diet, you Quit on you.

I help my weight loss clients improve the relationship with themselves.

If you really want to lose weight, you need to stop Quitting on yourself.

How do you do this?

Have an epic compelling reason to lose weight.
Commit to yourself.
Make decisions ahead of time.
Follow through on those decisions even when you don’t want to.
Be willing to feel & embrace the discomfort of negative emotions.
Sit with intense urges and not answer them.
Learn to fail and be resilient. 

Listen, I totally get it. 

It is very hard to lose weight. 

I wish I would have had someone like me to help me lose my weight. I have been a Flight Paramedic for over 15 years. I know the job and all the excuses of why we can’t lose weight. That is why I became a certified Life and Weight Loss Coach. I want to help other Flight Paramedics and Nurses lose weight. 

If you really want to lose the weight this year, I really want you to take the first step and click here to book a free consult call with me. You will leave the call with my number 1 weight loss tool you can carry with you on duty (and off!) and a better idea of how working with a coach who “gets it” can have you on your way to feeling Confident and Comfortable in your Flight Suit for 2019.

PS. If you really want to stop quitting on yourself and permanently lose the weight, hurry up and book a consult call with me. I have limited spots available due to my work schedule!

xo. VB

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Willpower

Willpower is a limited resource.

You know you are depending on Willpower when you have done “good” all day….then you get home from work the urges and overdesire take over and you find yourself eating a huge bowl of popcorn and on beer #3 {speaking from personal experience here my friends}.

The way to effortless & permanent weight loss is to learn how to NOT depend on willpower.

You need to learn a new skill, and it is called ALLOWING.

Allowing is very different than willpower.

They both feel uncomfortable.

One will lead to permeant weight loss and the other will lead to the “yo-yo” weight.

How do you allow urges and overdesire?

You just sit there and do nothing. Permission to be lazy.

But why is this so hard?

Because you will have to sit with the discomfort of your emotions.

Your primitive brain thinks you are experiencing real pain . It does not know if you are about to get attacked by a tiger or just feeling disappointed because you are not eating popcorn and drinking beer.

You just need to tell yourself, I’m ok. Nothing bad will happen to me. I’m just feeling negative emotion. No big deal. I can handle it. I need to experience this in order to lose weight today.

You got this. 

Practice allowing today and let me know how it goes.

If you need help with this…good news…I am very experienced with this and I CAN HELP YOU.

All you have to do it click on the blue “Book Now” button which will bring you to my scheduling page. Book a time that works for you and we will talk about how to get you losing weight right away. Super easy.

Talk soon.

xo. VB

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Tired

Welcome to HEMS….you will never sleep right again….

Ok, that’s a bit dramatic.

The truth of the matter is, if you do rotating shift work, your sleep will suffer.

I’m going to give you some tough love. 

STOP saying {and thinking in your head} “I’m so tired”

“I’m exhausted” “I didn’t get enough sleep”

NOBODY CARES.

What is the upside to constantly telling yourself {and anyone who will listen} that you are soooooo “tired”?

Most people assume we {Flight Crews} don’t get enough sleep.

Stop talking about it.

Ok, we got it…you’re sooooo tired….now what??

Are you going to let is stop you from making your 24 hour plan, prepping your meals, going for a walk, or whatever?

Or is your primitive brain giving your permission to be lazy, to do nothing all afternoon, make poor food choices, stay up watching Netflix?

I teach my clients to LISTEN to their bodies.

Eat when Hungry. Stop eating when satisfied.

When you are tired, you need to rest. 

Give your body what it needs, not what will make it feel good in the moment {Sugar, Flour, Facebook, Shopping, Netflix}.

You might be thinking this is obvious, but I want you to think back to the last time you said you were “tired” and what you really did about it.

The next time you find yourself telling the world how tired you are, make sure you are heading to the solution and not the pantry.

Try some of these thoughts on:

I can be tired and still make good food choices.

I can be tired and still follow my eating protocol.

I can be tired and do what needs to get done.

The solution to being tired is rest (or sleep).

If you are using your job as an excuse why you can’t lose weight and are looking for a permanent weight loss solution, let’s get on the phone and make a plan that you can implement while on duty and off.

Click on the blue Book Now button and sign up for a free consultation call with me. No pressure, I promise.

Let me help you lose weight and feel Confident & Comfortable in your flight suit….starting next week.

Talk soon.

xo. Valerie

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Insulin

INSULIN MAKES YOU FAT.

When I learned this, everything changed.

Quick disclaimer…I am not an MD, nor am I giving you any medical advise.

I am going to keep this super basic. If you want the finer deets….GI (my new abbreviation for Google It)!!

Insulin is a fat storage hormone.

Insulin goes up when your glucose goes up.

Your glucose and insulin go up every time you eat.

Some foods spike higher levels than others (duh!).

Sugar, Flour, Alcohol spike it highest.

Do you see where I’m going here?

Fat and Protein spike it the least.

I know what you are thinking….BACON. BUTTER!!

If you want to lose weight you MUST keep your insulin low.

When you eat, glucose and insulin go up. 

Your muscles and liver get their needed glucose, and what is left is stored as fat.

You eat again in 2-4 hours…the same thing happens…again and again and again.

One day you wake up and your flight suit is a bit more snug. 

You notice at quarterly weigh-ins that your up a few pounds. 

Let me help you create an eating protocol that works for YOUR body and YOUR schedule.

Speaking of schedules, click on the Book Now button and get on mine. 

Let’s talk for 30min and get you on your way to feeling CONFIDENT & COMFORTABLE in that flight suit again!!

xo. Valerie

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Self Talk

Self talk

What do you think of yourself?

Are you a mean girl?

Is most of your inner dialogue negative?

Just like you, I used to say the meanest, harshest things to myself.

I couldn’t figure out why I didn’t have the results I wanted in my life.

So I would be harder on myself. 

I believed that I could verbally beat myself thin.

The truth is this….negative thoughts produce negative feelings, which drive negative actions, ending in negative results.

Negativity begets more negativity.

I had tried everything to lose weight, to feel better, and to have a better life.

I wanted everything to be easy.

I wanted everything to change around me.

Turns out, I was very confused.

My weight loss journey started with deciding that I will never say another mean thing to myself again.

What did I have to lose with dropping the negative self talk?

Ummmm. Weight. I lost weight. 

I know this sounds crazy, but, have you ever tried it?

If you want positive results/changes in your life…you will ONLY get them by positive thoughts/feelings/actions.

Draw a line in the sand (ok, snow) right now. 

Never, ever…..say another shitty thing to yourself again.

Promise me.

It is so worth it.

Here’s a tip….when you hear that voice coming, interrupt her, put your foot down and say “Nope. We don’t talk like that anymore” and repeat as often as needed.

Bye Felicia!

xo. Valerie

PS.  I wold love to help you lose weight and stop the negative self talk.  Click on the blue button below.  This will bring you to my schedule page, there you can book a free 30 min consult call with me.  It is super easy and I know it will help you.

Help Me Lose Weight

The Model

The Model

The Model was created by my teacher and coach Brooke Castillo.

She didn’t come up with the concepts, but she organized them in a way that is easy to use.

This is the foundation of my coaching practice.

You can solve any problem by using The Model.

C-Circumstances
T-Thoughts
F-Feelings
A-Actions
R-Results

It’s a way to show you what you are creating in your life.

Here is an example.

If you are overeating, you plug that in the A line

C-
T-
F-
A-Overeating
R-

Ask yourself why am I overeating? Because pizza tastes so good. I chose pizza as the C because it is neutral and it’s triggering thoughts.

C-Pizza
T-It tastes so good
F-
A-Overeating
R-

When you think the thought “it tastes so good” how does that make you feel? Desire/wanting which drives overeating. 

C-Pizza
T-It tastes so good
F-Desire
A-Overeating
R-

The Action line is where willpower shows up. Willpower has limited supply. Most of us use up our willpower by 10am! No wonder it is so hard to not over the eat the pizza at dinner, our willpower has already been used up for the day.

What result do you get when you overeat? 

C-Pizza
T-It tastes so good
F-Desire
A-Overeating
R-You keep eating because you think it tastes so good

This is how our thinking keeps us overweight. Can you see that? It’s subtle.

Pizza is a neutral. You have the option to think many thoughts about it. All thoughts are available to you.

If you want to lose weight, you need to start practicing thoughts that will not result in overeating.

C-Pizza
T-I’ll be good with two slices
F-Satisfied 
A-Eat planned two slices
R-I only eat two slices 

Bringing awareness to your thinking, feeling, and actions give you good information. From there, you can make any changes you want!

I would love to help you make a change in your life. 

I used The Model to help me lose weight, and to help me keep it off.

Click the blue button below and set up a free 30 min consult call with me.  I can show you how The Model is working in your life.

Weight Loss starts with a Thought.

XO. Valerie

Show Me The Model

Results

Results

They are created by the actions we take.

This is your life.

Your result will prove or give evidence of your thought.

Positive thoughts end up in positive results.

Negative thoughts lead to negative results.

Many people believe their results are because of their circumstances, and not in their control.

Again, this is not true. 

You create your results.

You are responsible for your results because they come from your actions, your actions come from your feelings, and your feelings come from your thoughts.

This is great news!

Why?

Because thoughts are in your control.

As your coach, it is my job to show you this.

If you want real change in your life, you need to first see how you are the one creating the results in your life.

Instead of being judgmental about your results, get curious.

Then, you can empower yourself to create the results you really want in your life.

Current results; weigh 180#

What action(s) are you taking that are leading to this result? Overeating?

What feeling is driving that action? Desire? 

What thought are you having that is creating desire? I want that?

The circumstance could be ice cream.

Can you see this?

If this is making your brain hurt, I get it!

If you are ready to change the results in your life, I am here for you.

Click on the blue button below and let me show you how coaching can change your life!

XO, Valerie

I Want Results

Actions

Actions

Our actions are driven by our feelings.

Actions are the things we do or don’t do.

Reactions are also an action.

Our actions/ in-action/re-action are directly related to how we feel.

Many people think that their thoughts are what drive their actions.

Yet another misconception.

It is easy to see how this happens, many of us really want to avoid our feelings.

If we are feeling bored, one of our actions could be to go find something to snack on.

Did you know you could just sit there and be bored? Yep. Nothing bad will happen if you just sit with boredom.

For many people when they are mad, they yell. Can you imagine just sitting in your chair feeing mad and not doing anything? Totally possible.

Being aware of what you are thinking, what emotion you are feeling, and noticing how you act upon those feelings is kinda life changing.

The Think-Feel-Act cycle is always at play.

Once you see it in your own life, you will really see it play out in other peoples lives. 

So fascinating.

If you want to take different actions in your life, you do not need to change your circumstances. 

You need to change how you feel.

Do you remember from yesterday’s post how you do that??

YES! You got it.

You change your Thought….

And the circumstance gets to stay the same.

What kind of actions do you want to change?

Overeating? Overdrinking? Overspending? Gossiping?

This is all in your control. Nothing outside of you has to change for you to take different actions.

Want help? I’m here for you. Click on the blue button below.  This will take you to my schedule for a free 30 min consultation call with me!  Let’s get you taking new actions!

Xo. Valerie

I Want To Take ACTION

Feelings

Feelings

Feelings are an emotion we feel vibrating in our body.

Our feeling come from our thoughts.

Feeling start in the mind and travel to the body.

This is different from a sensation.

A sensation is involuntary, travels from the body to the mind.

Feelings = Happy. Mad. Sad. Angry

Sensations = Cold. Heat. Pain. Hunger.

Many people think feelings come from circumstances, other peoples actions, and are involuntary.

Nope.

Feelings come from your thinking.

And, as humans, we will feel negative emotions 50% of the time.

Yep, you read that right. It is NORMAL to feel negative emotions half the time.

I know this is confusing because society likes to make us think we need to be happy 100% of the time. 

We need the contrast of positive and negative feelings.

If we were happy all of the time, would we even know what true happiness is?

The reason why happiness feels so good is because we know what sadness feels like.

What are your top three feelings?

Why do you think you are feeling them?

How do you want to feel?

What does that emotion feel like in your body?

Start noticing your feelings and ask yourself “what thought is causing this feeling?”

Most of my clients think that when they lose weight they will feel better about themselves.

Not true, and honestly not helpful.

Positive feelings = positive results.

Negative feeling = negative results.

Learning to feel good where we are at is the way to feel good at your goal.

I promise you, being at your goal weight does not make you feel better about yourself.

Only your thoughts make you feel better about yourself, and that my friend, is available to you RIGHT NOW.

If you want to feel better about yourself, click on the blue button below and let me show you how. This will bring you to my schedule, you pick a date and time that work best for you.  

xxoo. Valerie

I Want To Feel Better

Thoughts

Thoughts

Thoughts are the sentences that constantly run through our minds.

We have an estimated 60,000-70,000 thoughts per day.

Sometimes we are very aware of our thoughts, but most of the time we are not.

Our thoughts are triggered by circumstances.

All of our drama is in our thinking.

The good new is you have total control over what you think.

No one can tell you what to think or believe.

Beliefs are just thoughts you keep on thinking with out question.

When we start to notice our thinking, it is alarming at how negative it is most of the time.

This is normal.

Your brain is always scanning for danger and trying to keep you safe.

If you want your life to be different all you have to do is think different thoughts!

This sounds so easy, but I know from personal experience that it is not.

First, you need to become aware of your thinking.

Then comes the realization that you are the one causing your own suffering (or joy!).

It is NOT the circumstance.

Finally, you need to deliberately think thoughts that serve you and keep moving you forward.

Practice is the mother of all skill.

You will need to think new thoughts on purpose and practice them!

I love showing my clients their thoughts.

They think they are telling me their circumstance.

And I will say…
“You know that is just a thought right?” 
“Why are you choosing to think that?” 
“Does that thought serve you?” 
“Did you know that that thought is optional?”

This is where the magic happens in coaching.

Getting authority over our own thinking.

What are you choosing to think on purpose today?

xo. Valerie

PS. I would love to help show you your thoughts!  Click the blue button below to schedule a free 30 min consult call.  Your weight loss starts with a thought….

Show Me My Thoughts

Circumstances

Circumstances

Circumstances are facts.

Facts are neutral….

Facts don’t hurt.

Circumstances are things that are out of our control.

The circumstances of our lives have no effect on us until we have a thought about it.

Examples of Circumstances are the weather, food, our past, and other peoples behaviors.

Most people believe that their feelings, actions, and results are caused by Circumstances.

This is just not true.

If someone dies, we don’t feel sad until we find out about the death. When they die (circumstance) it does not cause us immediate pain. When hear about the death and have a thought about it is when we feel the pain.

The circumstance of your life do not have power over you.

This is good to know.

Your weight is also neutral.

We know this because if you asked 5 random people what they thought about your weight, you would get 5 different thoughts.

Someone might think “Oh, I wished I was at that weight”, or “that seems like a lot”.

Many of my clients struggle with this.

This is where coaching is so beneficial.

I want to help show my clients that even their circumstances are neutral.

We believe other peoples are, but ours??? That is totally different.

It is not, I promise.

What are your neutral facts of life?

If you are  curious about this and how coaching may help you, click on the blue button below to schedule a free 30 min consult call with me.  

I love talking about this work!

Xo. Valerie

I Am Curious....

Get Back on Track

Get back on track

Did you “fall off the wagon” this weekend?

Too much food & booze?

It happens.

But, there is no wagon.

You didn’t fall off anything.

You simply had thoughts. Thoughts that lead to overeating & overdrinking.

I have a worksheet that I use with my clients.

It is called “learn and move on”.

Each time we overeat or overdrink, it’s a great opportunity to learn.

After we learn about why we overate or overdrank we simply move on.

It does not serve us to beat ourselves up over it and hang out in guilt and shame.

Guilt and shame will not drive you to do better today.

If you are trying to lose weight, you HAVE to F-up many times to learn what is really going on.

Learn. Move on. Repeat. Learn. Move on. Repeat.

This is the way to wight loss.

The key part is making the decision to get back on track.

And by track, I’m talking PROTOCOL.

You know what to do.

Just follow your protocol.

Easy.

Skip all the drama.

Focus on your next decision, not the next 10.

Need help creating a protocol that is perfect for you? This is what I do. I help you create a way of eating that fits your life. Not my life, not some other chicks life…yours.

If you really want to lose weight for the last time, click on the blue button below and set up a free 30 min consult call.  

xo. Valerie

I Want to Lose Weight for the Last Time

Exercise

Exercise.

Exercise is great. I love to exercise. 

I used to think that in order to lose weight you had exercise (workout).

I’m all for exercise, but NOT as a tool to lose weight.

If you are expecting weight loss to come from exercise, you are going to have to wait a VERY long time.

Most people will give up their exercise routine because they don’t see immediate results.

Exercise should be something you give yourself because it makes you feel good.

Not something to burn calories, or you dread doing.

This is a paradigm shift for many.

Find something that you love to do, that you will do with out the drudgery and expectation of weight loss in return.

Like to walk? Get out there and enjoy the fresh air.

Biking? Yoga? Gardening? Do what is fun for you.

Your body loves exercise, it feels good and is very good for your brain.

We need to give our brains a rest.

When you make a commitment to moving your body you give yourself emotional strength, the ability to overcome obstacles, pride, accomplishment and plenty of feel good endorphins.

You also tell yourself, and the people around you (kids especially) that you matter. Your health matters.

If you want to start exercising but are not sure what to try, think back to when you were a kid. What did you love to do way back when?

For me, I used to love to ride my bike. My dad, my best friend, and I would go for long bike rides all over the city. It was so much fun. I rode my bike everywhere.

It’s no wonder I have three bikes (in our very small garage) and love spinning class.

Biking is not a form of exercise for me. It is something that I love to give to myself. I love the freedom I feel while biking. I love the quiet on mountain bike trails, and the country roads. Yet, I love sweating and jamming to great music while in a spinning class….even enough to get up a 04:15 to go to class before working at 07:00!

Try a ton a new things, be adventurous and be ok if you suck at it for a while. Who cares!

Find something and have fun.

My clients are often very surprised that I do have them on a rigorous workout plan.
We talk about a concept called the Minimum Baseline for movement.

When you are trying to lose weight, you can’t also be in muscle building mode.

You have to pick one. 

Once you have lost your weight, that is a great time to start lifting weights to build your muscle strength, and there are studies that show how beneficial that is as we age.

If you are ready to lose weight and change your beliefs about exercising yourself thin I would love to chat with you. The way I teach weight loss is so different than most do.

Click on the blue button below which will take you to my schedule.  Pick and date and time that work for you.  It is 30 min that could change your life.

XO. Valerie

I Want To Lose Weight!